Shur'tugal

Oh!
I'm pretty sure I'm going to change this journal to FRIENDS ONLY~
so um yeah...get on that

http://www.worldslastchance.com/index.php?p=next_and_last_pope.php
BEWARE HIS SECOND COMING

So yesterday I went to a test run meeting of our unofficial anime club (test run referring to meeting on Sunday). I had a lot of fun, but then again I generally do have a lot when I go there--don't get me wrong I LOOOVE my deltas but anime club is just...everyone (all like 6 of us xD) is just amazing and I love them all <333 even Nick the loser :D So anway we met at 7:30 in the Union and watched some anime and youtube on my laptop~ <3 then somehow we talked of eating at Trax and so we did xD We made the cross-campus journey to TRAX and I'm sure I at least, weired some people out xD CAUSE I HAD MOUNTAIN DEEEEW. I don't really drink much soda anymore...mostly water but it was nice to get a change :3 just like when I get home I'm insisting on like Wendys or something like that one of those days...RAAWR


BUT ANYWAY
yes, soon my journal will be friends onry so um,..

SNAP TO IT

lol

I love how people I meet online tell me I'm pretty...

But no one out here has the guts to say it =(

Before I woke up this morning....

I saw a starch white sign with black lettering

"I CAN TELL YOU WHO YOU ARE"

And before I could read the name, or if any....

I woke up.

I had to put this somewhere....

I really don't like my friend's earring...it's just....@_@
Then again I don't like most earrings on most guys.
Hoops and big rocks are no-no.
Small studs are okay if only in one ear.

Gaaah and now I see him on facebook and he's taking a bunch of emo pictures that are sure to show the earring.

But it's not my decision to make really.


I think one of my bigger reasons for not liking it is because it makes him, Kevin, different.
Blah blah blah college is for change >:(



hohum


So lately I've been wondering about my choices here in college...and now I see myself on so many paths that I don't know where to go....

TELL ME
Where do you see me....

Writer
Fashion Designer
Psychologist
Teacher
Chef
Other?-explain!

So please, post back with what you think would fit me
then you can repost it if you want with your own career choices.....




NGANA

Well today was my first choral concert and the first one where not a member of my family came :3 It was interesting n___n
It was the Intercolligate Choral Festival of Western NY actually!
We were the third group to go on and the first group (which was entirely women) performed a favorite of mine, Ah si mon moine :D Though it kinda sounded funny with no men.

My ABSOLUTE FAVORITE was a song by the RIT singers from Australia called "Ngana" Gaaaah everything about it was wonderful, there was even hand clapping and foot stomping and GAAH

EVERYONE SHOULD LISTEN TO THAT SONG NOW

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=20265

Soo...my first ever college choir concert is this Saturday and our lineup is as follows...

Hodie Christus Natus Est
The Holly and the Ivy
How Lovely Are the Messengers
Magnificat (this name is longer but I'm too lazy to get up and look in my folder)

It's not really in that order but whatever....

It'll be interesting considering it's a collaboration of a bunch of choral groups :3 The one in december is just us performing in a church (I hope it's the Episcopal one....)

I'm...nervous I suppose. It's awkward to hold the music when I'm this close to a concert and I can't imagine how it'll feel up on the stage.

This is also the 1st concert my parents won't be coming to...which I'm okay with because I am around 6 hours away.

WHICH REMINDS ME

I cannot wait, cannot absolutely wait until the 20th of November. I'll be on a plane and by around 8:30ish I'll be at home with my dogs and my family!
EEEE
It'll be my first time home since...well since I came here. Unlike some people, I don't have the luxury of driving home every weekend.

Brain dead brain fuck
Get on your knees beg for me
Sickly sore and out of luck
Brain dead brain fuck

Right left front back
Listen to the locusts
They'll skin you alive
When you reach out a hand
To help them up

Let's see.

I wish to reflect upon my weekend, one I could have spent with friends

On the one hand the plan was half-baked, a good recipie on paper with horrid results in the kitchen. As much as I wanted to leave that Friday and travel to Potsdam...one day of planning is not something I can handle....I had so much in terms of an essay and homework and the play, not to mention the laundry that was slowly killing my wardrobe.

On the other....I felt an inexplicable wall fly up around me. To travel up there felt like I would be...intruding. Shaina told me we would surprise Kevin but...I feel that I may just be part of his shadow now...as if in some sick twisted joke of the past he wouldn't be around when we came calling or tell me 'OH! I didn't know you were coming, but I'm busy'

Not even to mention the fact that many of the Freeways or thruways or whatever were closed due to the snow we got. People spent the nights in their cars on the road and in a lot of places they couldn't plow until the cars were moved off the road.

I know you're probably mad at me...or disappointed.

I'm sorry. It seems as if I have my own self to get over first.

I regret it. Yet I don't
I'm lonely. Yet I am not
I'm bored. Yet I am comfortable
I'm happy. Yet I am utterly utterly sad

Or something like that

Hm...

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to kill someone


Thank you Dexter

( On Love and Death )

Two poems I just wrote...I rather like the 2nd one...a different outlook from my....usual subjects. It's always seemed like the perfect setting. Sitting on a park bench, or perhaps not as the snow falls....quiet, beautiful and sacred.

It is so funny (and almost very scary) how much this is ME

FEBRUARY: ABSTRACT THOUGHTS. Loves REALITY and ABSTRACT. Intelligent and clever. CHANGING PERSONALITY. Attractive. sexy. TEMPERAMENTAL. Quiet, SHY and humble. HONEST and LOYAL. DETERMINED to reach goals. Loves FREEDOM. REBELLIOUS when restricted. Loves AGGRESSIVENESS. Too SENSITIVE and easily HURT. Gets ANGRY really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.

Please, reflect.

LOLOLOLOLOL FIRST SNOW HERE AT BROCKPORT XDD

AND TONIGHT WAS DISNEY NIGHT IN THE DINING HALL SO THEY ONLY PLAYED DISNEY MUSIC


LOLOLOLOL

Pick up your feet and walk this crooked path with me
For my arms are bound behind my back
And my eyes are clamped shut so I may not see
the carnage of the world around us
Cobblestones, pebbles, rocks, dirt and peat
The only beings of this place I feel
beneath the soles of my own scarred feet
And the rain slipping down my face
As my empty eyes cry silently
Cools the meaty tongue hanging from my mouth
But the droplets do not quench me
I have arrived in my own hell
Where fire burns but leaves no sign
And water flows but does not heal
The only signs of pain kept inside
Rotting like a blackened peel


Blargh something I'm working on.
Nothing really new to report....

DREW A KICK ASS DRAGON THOUGH <33

I seem to have developed a fondness for someone...

but unfortunately they are intangible...a person I have met online....

We talk and he flatters me with compliments but that is true to his nature....

But still...

Perhaps that one quiz was right?

Perhaps I am destined to find love over cyberspace?

Will I ever find love?

Playing with my new Webcam~

Nevermind

Sometimes...

I wonder how far I would go if I never got caught.

Think about it...

I dwelled upon this as my 'food for thought' when I went walking today.

To have the freedom to destroy the aspects of your life that you detested and have nothing connecting you to this.

It would be like becomming as god among men, a judge among the guilty.

Then again, some people may wish for the recognition of their slayings.


Or something like that.

So please, share with me your thoughts. How far do you think you would go if there was never a chance of you getting caught?
Would the guilt pile in your mind until your skull burst with pleas of sorrow and remorse? Would you run straight to the police to report the incident?

...

Or would you smile, wipe the slate clean...and move on? Would you laugh at those who buckled under the weight of their own souls?


Where would you be?

Possibly more on this later, but I must reflect upon myself


Which I seem to do a lot lately.